Notes From the Underground: More Grad School Characters

  1. That graduate student that is good looking, doesn’t study, and parties too hard, and in the process gives himself Covid. I want to party like (and with) this guy, but…is he still contagious? What if he’s got long Covid?
  2. That graduate student that instead of taking notes during lecture does adult coloring books in a slow and painstaking way. Girl, I get it. This lecture sucks. But I’m loving your coloring. And you’re doing it on a tablet. Props.
  3. That graduate student who’s a thinker and thinks, thinks, thinks about…starting after-school projects, but doesn’t study for this classes. I love this guy. He’s starting amazing things, but even he admits he doesn’t study that much. I secretly think he’s a genius. Everything he says is automatically profound, and he has a contemplative aura around him. Fascinating. He also reads poetry. His boyfriend is a lucky guy.
  4. The Good Looking Guy (GLG) from a foreign country with the killer accent continues to accumulate ducklings that follow him around, men and women and everything in between. Point in fact, a girl physically stole my Covid-assigned seat so that she could sit next to him in class yesterday.
  5. That graduate student that announces during class that she was white and upper middle class. This was a little random. Came out of nowhere. Awkwardness ensued over Zoom.
  6. The graduate student with the Darth Vader voice. Love him. Never have seen him physically. He has his camera off on Zoom. But his voice is velvety. He should be on the radio. I told him today. With a voice like that, skip grad school, and just go straight to Hollywood.
  7. That graduate student who is “woke” and corrects everyone else on their respective cultures, because apparently she knows best. This has really become an archetype during these times of “cancel culture” and “wokeness” but man, is it annoying. I know, my age is showing.
  8. That graduate student that dances to Taylor Swift in her apartment to get inspired to start a new module on statistics. This would be me. Currently, the album Reputation is playing in the background. Thanks TayTay.
  9. That graduate student who’s asked to give his presentation and freaks out and says, “That’s today?!?” Oh my goodness, #rip. I felt for this guy. This is what nightmares are made of.